Bournemouth, England
There is somehting about the seaside that makes England want to put that touch of skank in place, and Bournemouth is no different.What is that stag parties, hen dos, neon lights and strippers have that links it to the beach? I have to admit I had high hopes travelling down in my first class train (no not as glamourous as it sounds) on my way to the 'mystery hotel' (ps not a mystery when you send me a letter telling me where it is). On arrival it suddenly made sense why when I announced my weekend plans to English people their eyebrows jumped sky high beofre they pulled their face back into place.
Travel tip 1: When asking people what a place is like and they respond "there's a sandy beach", don't get too distracted by that- ask for more, it is porbably skanksville.
Anyway after droppign stuff in the mystery hotel (turns out the mystery was trying to discover how the coudl call the room the 'executive' room) it was down to the beach for a bit of a stroll. Now I am not going to lie, there is nothing better than seeing your first sandy beach and hearing the waves after several months (a year if you don't count Malta, which I don't). If you were only looking atthe beach and not interacting with anyone else or needing to go into town Bournemoth is cool.
Travel tip 2: DO NOT be fooled by surfers in Bournemouth. They are not the fit young things with six packs and v that get changed behind a car door on West Coast Highway. They are old, with beer bellies and you suddenyl realise that the reason you didn't see anyone doing anything other than bobbing along on the board is because there is no way any of them have the corse strength to stand up!
Travel tip 3: When staying in a hotel that can only be described as questionable do not trust the receptions suggestion of where to go for dinner. Yes that road (have burnt the name form my memory, maybe Christchurch) may have everything you could possibly want ..... if you are on a stag do or hen do. PS if you are on a stag do Wiggles has the girls outside intheir underwear for a bit so no need to spend any money!
Anyway the next day was walk walk walk along the beach. Which to be honest was great. For those of you who don't know, Bournemouth invented the beahc hut house thingys and they're pretty cool. I'd lilke ot see it in summer with all the huts open.
Its an easy walk down to Boscombe which seemed to be much nicer, though like Bournemouth not a lot of cafes etc on the water. Its weird, if i was a a developer that's exactly what i would be putting there- good food. The walk to Boscombe is when we started the Chine obsession. Now it turns out Bournemouth is famous for the Chines but I still am not actually sure what one of these was. I have tried to put it into sentences to work it out- "What the Chine is that?"
"Get me a Chine will you"
"Chine over there"
"Its Chine to see you"
And I still haven't solved this mystery, in fact I think I became more like a smurf using smurf as noun, adjective, verb etc The closest I have gotten is thinking it might be A gap in the cliff that they build a road in cause that's what there was at Audley Chine and Middle Chine but if that is the case, I think using the term 'touritst site' is a little bit of a stretch.
According to all my research (lonely planet 1 page on Bournemouth and Bournemouth website I got sent the link to) Bournemouth has many things to do in all sorts of weather- sunny, cloudy and rainy which was lucky cause we had all of that on the Sunday. The other great thing is that the 3 lists have all the same things just in different order, so you don't feel like you are missing anything! Basically it comes down to this:
1. Beach- tick
2. Russell something museum- tick. actually was pretty good, seems to be all the stuff Russell stole on his travels around the world (yes I am sure he stole them as the only section when the word 'purchased' was used was when they were talking about the Russian artifacts)
3. Oceanarium- no tick. This looked like the skanks version of Underwater world which is cool but I thin £10 to look at fish is a little steep.
All in all Bournemouth is probably a completely different place in the sun (like most places but more so on a beach) and if you're not going for a swim don't plan on staying long.
High point: The sun coming out while we were sitting on the beach and imagining myself somewhere else
Low point: Realising had spent the evening eating dinner effectively playing skank spotto but a bit more subtler.
Tuesday, 1 March 2011
Monday, 31 January 2011
Where's the craic?
Belfast, North Ireland
Interestingly enough this was the 3rd visit I've done to Belfast but the 1st time I have ever seen the city. Doing a quick poll of 1 it was discovered that many people think there is nothing interesting about Belfast- there's no Eiffle Tower, Leaning Tower of Pisa, Brauhaus etc but you could not be more wrong and at the end of the trip i did a new poll where Belfast was voted "O for awesome."
Coming in on a Friday night I did what any smart traveller does on arriving in any Irish destination- found the first pub and got myself some guiness and mash potato and to be honest, this set the theme for the weekend.
i had been recommended to do a black taxi tour of Belfast by a few people (you probably have been as well if you've been there) and i have to admit i was a little worried when the driver appear without a black taxi- now i am sure that there must be some trade descriptions/consumer protection law type thingy which must apply and my brain starts gearing up to start a little complaining- and then i remember the first rule of ireland as taught to me by my father: never let the truth get in the way of a good story; and of course i assume the same for my 'black taxi tour' not in a black taxi. meanwhile all of this has taken place inside my brain in the space of 30 seconds so i am completely ready to get in the car when the door is opened and the tour is started. the tour was excellent, the stories that he told were brilliant and i had no idea about all of the murals which were around the city. i am not one of those people recommending the back taxi tours- they have to be one of the best things the city has to offer.
the next tour which took me by surprise was the city hall tour which we did cause it was freezing cold and there was a definite need to get warm and i have to say it did not suck. the building itself is gorgeous and i do have a thing for buildings (and bridges lets not forget bridges, but there were no bridges in the town hall) and the guide was good and it was FREE. you just have to love free things.
it was after this when we head over to joing the walking tour of pubs at The Crown that it was discovered that i had come to belfast at the wrong time of year. the pub tour and many other bits of fun did not start until may- that should definitely be a travel tip. But not to worry who needs a tour to do what is essentially a pub crawl.
Travel tip 1: when creating your own pub crawl tour in belfast, or any other city for that matter, ensure that all members of the tour are up to date on the international rules of pub crawl. after taking a vote and going with the majority it was decided i was right and that it is a minimum of 2 drinks per pub unless its really crap or you discover you have turned up in the trendiest pace and one of your party is wearing a Year 12 leavers jumper.you may hear differing opinions on these rules of pub crawl but fair is fair and majority rules.
Travel tip 2: in ireland leave all our normal london suspicions about cab driver behind- apparently here they are all unofficial tour leaders and you will get some awesome stories and ideas for fun out of them
Due to travel tip 2 our new friend Jim took us to all the things wee hadn't yet seen in belfast- the titanic docks (its official, it is not there, it i only an empty dock that you see), stormont which was amazing and Jim drove us right up to the front door as well as Belfast castle (you didn't think there would be european city without a castle did you) which seems to have a weird preoccupation with cats that i can't explain.
Travel tip 3: when pub crawling through belfast beware the GAP year beggar- I mean what the!!! kids on the streets begging outside of pubs to help fund their gap year- get a job instead (yes i have become the old person yelling at kids to get a job). Meanwhile it either wasn't going to well or they hadn't aimed their sights too high as one was from Belfast and the other from Dublin- no African working with the poor for those 2.
Travel tip 4: It is impossible to be a bobble head when you eat potato. Don't try to fight it. you will eat more potato than you every thought possible and love every minute of it. do not pack figure hugging clothes.
High point: now this is a toughie its either watching the black cab tour guy walter explaining that i was taking photos of a house because my dad used to live there- not cause they were in trouble or a new target OR discovering walter is Jim's uncle OR late night chips and gravy on the way home on Saturday night. it pretty hard to beat chips and gravy.
Low point: Dry retching in the Duke of York due to someone feeling the need to drop the kids off in a public bathroom .not cool there should be some rules against that.
Interestingly enough this was the 3rd visit I've done to Belfast but the 1st time I have ever seen the city. Doing a quick poll of 1 it was discovered that many people think there is nothing interesting about Belfast- there's no Eiffle Tower, Leaning Tower of Pisa, Brauhaus etc but you could not be more wrong and at the end of the trip i did a new poll where Belfast was voted "O for awesome."
Coming in on a Friday night I did what any smart traveller does on arriving in any Irish destination- found the first pub and got myself some guiness and mash potato and to be honest, this set the theme for the weekend.
i had been recommended to do a black taxi tour of Belfast by a few people (you probably have been as well if you've been there) and i have to admit i was a little worried when the driver appear without a black taxi- now i am sure that there must be some trade descriptions/consumer protection law type thingy which must apply and my brain starts gearing up to start a little complaining- and then i remember the first rule of ireland as taught to me by my father: never let the truth get in the way of a good story; and of course i assume the same for my 'black taxi tour' not in a black taxi. meanwhile all of this has taken place inside my brain in the space of 30 seconds so i am completely ready to get in the car when the door is opened and the tour is started. the tour was excellent, the stories that he told were brilliant and i had no idea about all of the murals which were around the city. i am not one of those people recommending the back taxi tours- they have to be one of the best things the city has to offer.
the next tour which took me by surprise was the city hall tour which we did cause it was freezing cold and there was a definite need to get warm and i have to say it did not suck. the building itself is gorgeous and i do have a thing for buildings (and bridges lets not forget bridges, but there were no bridges in the town hall) and the guide was good and it was FREE. you just have to love free things.
it was after this when we head over to joing the walking tour of pubs at The Crown that it was discovered that i had come to belfast at the wrong time of year. the pub tour and many other bits of fun did not start until may- that should definitely be a travel tip. But not to worry who needs a tour to do what is essentially a pub crawl.
Travel tip 1: when creating your own pub crawl tour in belfast, or any other city for that matter, ensure that all members of the tour are up to date on the international rules of pub crawl. after taking a vote and going with the majority it was decided i was right and that it is a minimum of 2 drinks per pub unless its really crap or you discover you have turned up in the trendiest pace and one of your party is wearing a Year 12 leavers jumper.you may hear differing opinions on these rules of pub crawl but fair is fair and majority rules.
Travel tip 2: in ireland leave all our normal london suspicions about cab driver behind- apparently here they are all unofficial tour leaders and you will get some awesome stories and ideas for fun out of them
Due to travel tip 2 our new friend Jim took us to all the things wee hadn't yet seen in belfast- the titanic docks (its official, it is not there, it i only an empty dock that you see), stormont which was amazing and Jim drove us right up to the front door as well as Belfast castle (you didn't think there would be european city without a castle did you) which seems to have a weird preoccupation with cats that i can't explain.
Travel tip 3: when pub crawling through belfast beware the GAP year beggar- I mean what the!!! kids on the streets begging outside of pubs to help fund their gap year- get a job instead (yes i have become the old person yelling at kids to get a job). Meanwhile it either wasn't going to well or they hadn't aimed their sights too high as one was from Belfast and the other from Dublin- no African working with the poor for those 2.
Travel tip 4: It is impossible to be a bobble head when you eat potato. Don't try to fight it. you will eat more potato than you every thought possible and love every minute of it. do not pack figure hugging clothes.
High point: now this is a toughie its either watching the black cab tour guy walter explaining that i was taking photos of a house because my dad used to live there- not cause they were in trouble or a new target OR discovering walter is Jim's uncle OR late night chips and gravy on the way home on Saturday night. it pretty hard to beat chips and gravy.
Low point: Dry retching in the Duke of York due to someone feeling the need to drop the kids off in a public bathroom .not cool there should be some rules against that.
do you like to super hard core party?
Salzburg, Austria
I can not recommend a more beautiful route into Salzburg than the train from Bled (that being said the only other way I came was a sleazy jet flight). The trip through the mountains is gorgeous and i am starting to think that train travel is how Europe is supposed to be done. Luckily enough we were clever pants and booked seats as the train was full and everyone had stacks of luggage but we sat there smugly with our seat reservations which had cost fiver extra each. Obviously the other big plus is getting further into the city than you get into with a plane.
Salzburg is another one of those typically beautiful European cities with a nice river & bridges (yes i like bridges) and a castle (surprise surprise) as well as being shut outside normal trading hours (am sure London has ruined me with this, I wouldn't even expect it coming from Perth). I went to Salzburg with 3 things in mind- east as much food as possible, do the sound of music things and super hard core party- its arguable if i actually did that.
Food wise i stuffed myself full of the usual- bratwurst, frankfurter, schnitzel, bratwurst, pretzel, bratwurst, hot chocolate (is that a food?), bratwurst... you get the idea. i have to say though the best meal ie ate so much i felt sick & happy, was in a brauhause i found just up past the FUN-icular up to the castle. You see my fellow travellers had turned on me and all become infected in what is officially known as The Elvish Terrorist Flu Pandemic of 2011which forced me to wander in the cold all on my tod but 2 awesome things were the result of this 1 was discovering all the salzburgians in the town square listening to an orchestra play and waltzing (yes i waltzed a little by myself) and the 2nd was the brauhause which i would never have found on my own. the brauhause was one of those ones where they like to ignore foreigners and get grumpy with them when they want such trivial things such as more beer or the bill- for some reason these ones are always the best.
Being a good traveller i dragged myself out for the sound of music tour which actually is a good tour & the prices are nowhere near as jacked up as I think they would be in England were running them. PS if you didn't know the von trapps were real people! who would have thought!
Coming into austia i was convinced that like our friends the germans the austrians would be a fan of the super hard core partying, and i have to say, i was excited. New Years eve kicks off around 4 pm when they start firing the canons and then leads into fire works carnage. and when i say carnage i mean carnage- the spectators do try to compete with the official firework program
Travel tip 1: when hearing canons firing in a western European city do not scream a little and try to hide- you will just look stupid. for all ho do not watch or read the news (like me) THERE IS CURRENTLY NO WAR IN WESTERN EUROPE
Travel tip 2: do not expect austrians to be at the new years celebrations in salzburg- they all bugger off else where and leave the city to the italians.
if you read any travel book you'll hear them slating the italians in salzburg for new years but i have to say i found it hilarious and most exciting of all was finding a German in the queue for champagne and asking him about super hard core partying to which he responded "YEAH i like to super hard core party!!!! but my girlfriend doesn't so I'm not really allowed to"
Travel tip 3: when going up to the castle (which you inevitably will, even if you try not) do not bother waiting in the long queue for the 'free guided tour' i have expert witnesses reporting that it is not worth it- i personally did not bother and made up my own stories and found ways to take slightly obscene photos wherever possible (the real way to do a castle)
High point: managing to get a table at Augustine brauhaus/ brewery after trekking up there 2 days earlier to find it closed for the holidays but most importantly of all getting a mystery sausage with ,melted cheese in it! YEAH I love mystery meet
Travel tip 4: when going into a brauhaus watch the locals to see how it works there's nothing they love more than watching us foreigners walking up to the guy with the beer and smugly say "drie bier bitte" only to discover that you need to go see the other guy and pay , then get your steins and then go to the beer guy
Low point: Being in the toy museum and dressing up in the costumes, playing with toys & taking photos and realising its not as fun alone ... and you look like a weirdo
I can not recommend a more beautiful route into Salzburg than the train from Bled (that being said the only other way I came was a sleazy jet flight). The trip through the mountains is gorgeous and i am starting to think that train travel is how Europe is supposed to be done. Luckily enough we were clever pants and booked seats as the train was full and everyone had stacks of luggage but we sat there smugly with our seat reservations which had cost fiver extra each. Obviously the other big plus is getting further into the city than you get into with a plane.
Salzburg is another one of those typically beautiful European cities with a nice river & bridges (yes i like bridges) and a castle (surprise surprise) as well as being shut outside normal trading hours (am sure London has ruined me with this, I wouldn't even expect it coming from Perth). I went to Salzburg with 3 things in mind- east as much food as possible, do the sound of music things and super hard core party- its arguable if i actually did that.
Food wise i stuffed myself full of the usual- bratwurst, frankfurter, schnitzel, bratwurst, pretzel, bratwurst, hot chocolate (is that a food?), bratwurst... you get the idea. i have to say though the best meal ie ate so much i felt sick & happy, was in a brauhause i found just up past the FUN-icular up to the castle. You see my fellow travellers had turned on me and all become infected in what is officially known as The Elvish Terrorist Flu Pandemic of 2011which forced me to wander in the cold all on my tod but 2 awesome things were the result of this 1 was discovering all the salzburgians in the town square listening to an orchestra play and waltzing (yes i waltzed a little by myself) and the 2nd was the brauhause which i would never have found on my own. the brauhause was one of those ones where they like to ignore foreigners and get grumpy with them when they want such trivial things such as more beer or the bill- for some reason these ones are always the best.
Being a good traveller i dragged myself out for the sound of music tour which actually is a good tour & the prices are nowhere near as jacked up as I think they would be in England were running them. PS if you didn't know the von trapps were real people! who would have thought!
Coming into austia i was convinced that like our friends the germans the austrians would be a fan of the super hard core partying, and i have to say, i was excited. New Years eve kicks off around 4 pm when they start firing the canons and then leads into fire works carnage. and when i say carnage i mean carnage- the spectators do try to compete with the official firework program
Travel tip 1: when hearing canons firing in a western European city do not scream a little and try to hide- you will just look stupid. for all ho do not watch or read the news (like me) THERE IS CURRENTLY NO WAR IN WESTERN EUROPE
Travel tip 2: do not expect austrians to be at the new years celebrations in salzburg- they all bugger off else where and leave the city to the italians.
if you read any travel book you'll hear them slating the italians in salzburg for new years but i have to say i found it hilarious and most exciting of all was finding a German in the queue for champagne and asking him about super hard core partying to which he responded "YEAH i like to super hard core party!!!! but my girlfriend doesn't so I'm not really allowed to"
Travel tip 3: when going up to the castle (which you inevitably will, even if you try not) do not bother waiting in the long queue for the 'free guided tour' i have expert witnesses reporting that it is not worth it- i personally did not bother and made up my own stories and found ways to take slightly obscene photos wherever possible (the real way to do a castle)
High point: managing to get a table at Augustine brauhaus/ brewery after trekking up there 2 days earlier to find it closed for the holidays but most importantly of all getting a mystery sausage with ,melted cheese in it! YEAH I love mystery meet
Travel tip 4: when going into a brauhaus watch the locals to see how it works there's nothing they love more than watching us foreigners walking up to the guy with the beer and smugly say "drie bier bitte" only to discover that you need to go see the other guy and pay , then get your steins and then go to the beer guy
Low point: Being in the toy museum and dressing up in the costumes, playing with toys & taking photos and realising its not as fun alone ... and you look like a weirdo
let's get ratted
Bled, Slovenia
For those of you who don't know Lake Bled is the 7th most beautiful lake in the world- voted by Bledians who have seen 7 lakes. Well that's what we have assumed as i have not seen any research to back up the claim. Research aside, it is gorgeous and if the vote was opened to non-Bledians I think i would vote for it as well (though i have no idea what lakes i would put in position 1-6, or 8 an beyond but that's beside the point). Bled is a picturesque town on a gorgeous lake which has a little island in the middle and a castle on top of a cliff looking over the lake. to be honest, its the sort of things that postcards are made of.
There is easy access to skiing/ snowboarding over at Bohinj (i think that's where we were, really must pay more attention) which isn't bad. Not much in the way of facilities if your now on the slopes but still good. It was way busies than Kranky Pants but that may have more to do with the the fact that holidays had started than location.
Travel tip 1: when the slopes are starting to get really and the kamikaze nazi attack skiers keep coming for you its better to go have a beer than attack back
one of the most interesting and confusing thing you will probably find about Bled is the fact that there is a mexican restaurant there, and i recommend it! not particularly for the food- they seem to think a fajita is something different to what i do- but for the waiter. Not only will he confuse you while you try and work out if he is hot or not but he will teach you a few things about slovenia. For example, participating in only one olympics does not make you a real athlete and you can be famous for being 'the gay'.
Now my understanding is that Bled has a hip and happening night life- there is a casino (man those slovenia sLOVEnia those casinos) but there is a night club. unfortunately i can't comment on them as got too drunk in my apartment to find out. oh well.
Travel tip 2: do not get excited about sandwiches in slovenia. its seems one company has the monopoly of the whole industry and even though it is an extensive and slightly exciting menu any place you go into will only have a maximum of 4 of the 30 on offer.
High point: meeting monk andre up at the castle and listening to him tell us stories and explain dirty jokes while we drink the champagne out of the bottle that he taught me to chop the top off... with a sword!!!!
Low point: climbing all the way up to the castle on a track that turned into a construction site half way up only to discover that you weren't supposed to have gone that way... oh who am i kidding, that was funny.
For those of you who don't know Lake Bled is the 7th most beautiful lake in the world- voted by Bledians who have seen 7 lakes. Well that's what we have assumed as i have not seen any research to back up the claim. Research aside, it is gorgeous and if the vote was opened to non-Bledians I think i would vote for it as well (though i have no idea what lakes i would put in position 1-6, or 8 an beyond but that's beside the point). Bled is a picturesque town on a gorgeous lake which has a little island in the middle and a castle on top of a cliff looking over the lake. to be honest, its the sort of things that postcards are made of.
There is easy access to skiing/ snowboarding over at Bohinj (i think that's where we were, really must pay more attention) which isn't bad. Not much in the way of facilities if your now on the slopes but still good. It was way busies than Kranky Pants but that may have more to do with the the fact that holidays had started than location.
Travel tip 1: when the slopes are starting to get really and the kamikaze nazi attack skiers keep coming for you its better to go have a beer than attack back
one of the most interesting and confusing thing you will probably find about Bled is the fact that there is a mexican restaurant there, and i recommend it! not particularly for the food- they seem to think a fajita is something different to what i do- but for the waiter. Not only will he confuse you while you try and work out if he is hot or not but he will teach you a few things about slovenia. For example, participating in only one olympics does not make you a real athlete and you can be famous for being 'the gay'.
Now my understanding is that Bled has a hip and happening night life- there is a casino (man those slovenia sLOVEnia those casinos) but there is a night club. unfortunately i can't comment on them as got too drunk in my apartment to find out. oh well.
Travel tip 2: do not get excited about sandwiches in slovenia. its seems one company has the monopoly of the whole industry and even though it is an extensive and slightly exciting menu any place you go into will only have a maximum of 4 of the 30 on offer.
High point: meeting monk andre up at the castle and listening to him tell us stories and explain dirty jokes while we drink the champagne out of the bottle that he taught me to chop the top off... with a sword!!!!
Low point: climbing all the way up to the castle on a track that turned into a construction site half way up only to discover that you weren't supposed to have gone that way... oh who am i kidding, that was funny.
Are you sure that's how you say that?
Ljubljana, Slovenia
I strongly believe that there a few cities in the world that need more than a weekend to 'do them'- to name a few off the top of my head; London, New York & France- pretty sure that's it. LLjubljana we worked out to be about 2 hours. Saying its not a big city is an understatement, in fact I hear on the Slovenian grape vine that you can drive across the whole country in about 2 hours. But all that aside it is pretty.
Christmas eve we set out as a group of 7 to explore the city, get some food and maybe our booze on. After hearing great reviews of the Christmas markets we figured this was the place to get into the Christmas spirit. What we didn't know was that Ljubljana seems to shut about 5pm on Christmas eve and not open again until Boxing day (known as Slovenian Independence day, which doesn't have the same ring to it). With no markets to view we settled for mulled wine and wandering in the freezing cold looking for food. Now it could be that we went the wrong way but there were no restaurants to be found open and we ended up eating in a bar who went and got the food from the kebab shop across the road- oh well it made for a good joke for the rest of the trip.
Once boxing day came along and the city opened again it was time for exploring. It turned out we had seen all the sights on our freezing cold wanderings. While it is pretty if you're one for enjoying ticking sights off a list, this is not the place for you with only a small amount of exaggeration I can say that there are approx 10 sites to see. The castle itself is worth going up to for the views and for the fact that they seem to have sign in books for every doorway up there- to follow in my footsteps flick through the book till you see "team turban was here 2011" which kept me amused for an hour or so.
Travel tip 1: if looking to be 'bang on trend' or in fact ahead of trend pop down to the markets in Ljubljana on Boxing day and grab yourself some winter headwear that they are trialling for the new season. You to can look as glah-morous as I in a nice new turban.
Travel tip 2: For a fun game stand slightly hidden by the dragon bridge watching people walk across and every time the dragon doesn't wave yell slut at them - it is a true fact that the dragon waves to virgins (must be a fact as I read it book and on the internet)
The absolute highlight of the city was heading down to the caves in Postojna- ok technically not the city but well worth doing. You will pay a ridiculous fortune hiring a taxi to drive down & wait but do it. You might get there and think '20 euros to get in some caves that's ridiculous, it was way cheaper in Lebanon', but again just do it. These have got to be the best caves I have seen (yes better than Yallingup and Lebanon) and what makes them even better is the indianna jones style little train that takes you flying through them before you get out and walk around.
Travel tip 3: when joining a tour group for English speakers do a quick pole to check that everyone in the group are in fact English speakers and not just Slovenians practising their English. news flash- it is not practising English when you are speaking with the tour guide in Slovenian the whole time and the real English speakers will inevitably get annoyed with this behaviour an 'accidentally' trip up one of your little fatty boomba kids.
High point: waiting for Santa for over an hour in the freezing cold and then having him look over to you as you scream his name like an insane person over and over again (thoroughly recommended)
Low point: realising you had come all that way for a white Christmas and all you got was rain... and there was snow in England
I strongly believe that there a few cities in the world that need more than a weekend to 'do them'- to name a few off the top of my head; London, New York & France- pretty sure that's it. LLjubljana we worked out to be about 2 hours. Saying its not a big city is an understatement, in fact I hear on the Slovenian grape vine that you can drive across the whole country in about 2 hours. But all that aside it is pretty.
Christmas eve we set out as a group of 7 to explore the city, get some food and maybe our booze on. After hearing great reviews of the Christmas markets we figured this was the place to get into the Christmas spirit. What we didn't know was that Ljubljana seems to shut about 5pm on Christmas eve and not open again until Boxing day (known as Slovenian Independence day, which doesn't have the same ring to it). With no markets to view we settled for mulled wine and wandering in the freezing cold looking for food. Now it could be that we went the wrong way but there were no restaurants to be found open and we ended up eating in a bar who went and got the food from the kebab shop across the road- oh well it made for a good joke for the rest of the trip.
Once boxing day came along and the city opened again it was time for exploring. It turned out we had seen all the sights on our freezing cold wanderings. While it is pretty if you're one for enjoying ticking sights off a list, this is not the place for you with only a small amount of exaggeration I can say that there are approx 10 sites to see. The castle itself is worth going up to for the views and for the fact that they seem to have sign in books for every doorway up there- to follow in my footsteps flick through the book till you see "team turban was here 2011" which kept me amused for an hour or so.
Travel tip 1: if looking to be 'bang on trend' or in fact ahead of trend pop down to the markets in Ljubljana on Boxing day and grab yourself some winter headwear that they are trialling for the new season. You to can look as glah-morous as I in a nice new turban.
Travel tip 2: For a fun game stand slightly hidden by the dragon bridge watching people walk across and every time the dragon doesn't wave yell slut at them - it is a true fact that the dragon waves to virgins (must be a fact as I read it book and on the internet)
The absolute highlight of the city was heading down to the caves in Postojna- ok technically not the city but well worth doing. You will pay a ridiculous fortune hiring a taxi to drive down & wait but do it. You might get there and think '20 euros to get in some caves that's ridiculous, it was way cheaper in Lebanon', but again just do it. These have got to be the best caves I have seen (yes better than Yallingup and Lebanon) and what makes them even better is the indianna jones style little train that takes you flying through them before you get out and walk around.
Travel tip 3: when joining a tour group for English speakers do a quick pole to check that everyone in the group are in fact English speakers and not just Slovenians practising their English. news flash- it is not practising English when you are speaking with the tour guide in Slovenian the whole time and the real English speakers will inevitably get annoyed with this behaviour an 'accidentally' trip up one of your little fatty boomba kids.
High point: waiting for Santa for over an hour in the freezing cold and then having him look over to you as you scream his name like an insane person over and over again (thoroughly recommended)
Low point: realising you had come all that way for a white Christmas and all you got was rain... and there was snow in England
I'm in sLOVEnia
Kranjska Gora, Slovenia
Its hard to believe that a ski resort which only a short 2 hour flight, then half an hour taxi away from London can take 12 hours, but it did. We had the definite please of trying to leave Gatwick during a massive snow storm and as Gatwick have invested millions into updating their snow equipment and become the best equip in England, it meant that we got to be held waiting on our plane for 6 hours and in the airport for an additional 4-- super fun start to the trip!
Travel tip 1: do not keep drunk Slovenian on a tiny plane for 6 hours with no explanation, it will start to get a little ugly.
Not to worry, a short approx 13 hours later we arrive in the dead of the night to Kranjska Gora. Interestingly enough, one of the things I have noticed in my travels is that no ski resort looks great at 1am, you're just too grumpy. However, the next day is always a different story.
Kranjska Gora (also known as kransky gransky) is not a bad little resort. It offers night skiing (which looks like the aliens have landed) and has a few runs for beginners & intermediates. its no France but then the longest the queue for the lift was 5 people so I can live with that. The big difference come in the prices when you're there- so refreshing to pay a whole week lift pass for a 2 day French one and not paying 4 euros for a coke on the mountain!
Travel tip 2: Ski lifts at Kransky Pantsky will speed up when its time for you to lower your bum onto the chair- but after nearly killing yourself on it all day because you just can't get the timing right, when you do get it the lift guy will give you a very solid thumbs up and manically happy smile-- because you're worth it!
Travel tip 3: do not risk having a rest day ona snowboarding trip, you have inevitably jinxed the weather and will spend the rest of the time soaking wet and wondering how rain can wash that much snow away in such a short time
High Point: being suckered into ordering too much food & booze by the best waiter/elf known to man and feeling slightly sick afterward. Yes people that was actually a high point
Low Point: This one is a toss up between being able to smell the reindeer but not see them (one can only assume they were reindeer for eating) and taking 3 days to get my arse down to the fur shop only to discover madame fur lady believes opening hours are a guide not a rule)
Its hard to believe that a ski resort which only a short 2 hour flight, then half an hour taxi away from London can take 12 hours, but it did. We had the definite please of trying to leave Gatwick during a massive snow storm and as Gatwick have invested millions into updating their snow equipment and become the best equip in England, it meant that we got to be held waiting on our plane for 6 hours and in the airport for an additional 4-- super fun start to the trip!
Travel tip 1: do not keep drunk Slovenian on a tiny plane for 6 hours with no explanation, it will start to get a little ugly.
Not to worry, a short approx 13 hours later we arrive in the dead of the night to Kranjska Gora. Interestingly enough, one of the things I have noticed in my travels is that no ski resort looks great at 1am, you're just too grumpy. However, the next day is always a different story.
Kranjska Gora (also known as kransky gransky) is not a bad little resort. It offers night skiing (which looks like the aliens have landed) and has a few runs for beginners & intermediates. its no France but then the longest the queue for the lift was 5 people so I can live with that. The big difference come in the prices when you're there- so refreshing to pay a whole week lift pass for a 2 day French one and not paying 4 euros for a coke on the mountain!
Travel tip 2: Ski lifts at Kransky Pantsky will speed up when its time for you to lower your bum onto the chair- but after nearly killing yourself on it all day because you just can't get the timing right, when you do get it the lift guy will give you a very solid thumbs up and manically happy smile-- because you're worth it!
Travel tip 3: do not risk having a rest day ona snowboarding trip, you have inevitably jinxed the weather and will spend the rest of the time soaking wet and wondering how rain can wash that much snow away in such a short time
High Point: being suckered into ordering too much food & booze by the best waiter/elf known to man and feeling slightly sick afterward. Yes people that was actually a high point
Low Point: This one is a toss up between being able to smell the reindeer but not see them (one can only assume they were reindeer for eating) and taking 3 days to get my arse down to the fur shop only to discover madame fur lady believes opening hours are a guide not a rule)
Tuesday, 18 January 2011
oh, poor little rich kid
Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates
You could be forgiven for thinking that Abu Dhabi is just a place that reminds you of that annoying rich kid at school- more money than they know what to do with, a little boring and an example of money not buying class. It certainly was my first impression, that being said the first time i was there was 2009 with work and i had the privilege of being there in Ramada (bloody hot + no fun = v annoying) and I got to stay in the work villa which included the office so arguably i didn’t really get to know the city.
This trip has worked out a little different.
Let’s start with the weather- holy flamoly batman what difference it is in January. The days are beautifully warm, that awesome temperature around 23 degrees. And this time i actually got to stay in a hotel (more about that later so off I trot after work down to the Corniche. One of the things i have learnt through my extensive middle eastern travel (yes now that is Jordan, Lebanon, Turkey & UAE- pretty sure that counts as extensive) is that the Corniche rocks. It reminds me of home down there on the water. So down on the Corniche in Abu Dhabi a promenaded (as that is what you do on a cornice). Now its no Lebanon cornice (severely lacking in bread handbags) but it was here that i discovered that everyone is Abu Dhabi and not big lard arses that don’t walk anywhere i was just looking in the wrong place (or i found all the foreigners and my initial opion was right).
Deciding to explore a little more i adventured off the cornice and through the city. Now let me warn you here people- the map that i was given from the hotel had only every say 10 streets which made it a little difficult. Add that in with feeling like i had taken a wrong turn into India i finally found some roads which met up on my map. This caused a little, momentary freak- according to my map i was way off location possible hours off location. So what did i do? I decided to treat that map like satnav and ignore it and continue going the way i wanted- guess who won that arguement.
Feeling liberated by staying in a hotel & my after work cornice expedition i decide to plan out some more after work excursions. Excitedly i looked online and learnt there were many exciting things to see and do in abu dhabi- the cornice, the grand mosque and malls, malls & more malls. Whoop whoop.
The blue mosque was pretty cool, though that being said i don’t know if i would have picked that pattern for the world’s largest carpet.
High: laughing at the dummies dressed in all their saris with sunnies on looking cool- then realising i was rocking trousers, long sleeve top with dress over the top and scarf jauntily wrapped around my head.... and sunglasses.
Low: realising i had been staring way to long trying to work out how the woman with bull burkha one was going to eat her burger without flashing a little face.
Travel tip: do not trust maps, they will only confuse you in the middle east.
Travel tip 2: apparently all the good stuff is outside of the city for abu dhabi- camels, sand ... camels
Travel tip 3: Just because you see 10,000 Hardees sign and really want a Fishtastic doesn't mean you'll be able to find one.
Travel tip 4: i don’t think i’m wrong about the spoilt rich kid thing- a desert country should not be showing off with that many water fountains, it’s just rude (yes i realise that was not a tip).
You could be forgiven for thinking that Abu Dhabi is just a place that reminds you of that annoying rich kid at school- more money than they know what to do with, a little boring and an example of money not buying class. It certainly was my first impression, that being said the first time i was there was 2009 with work and i had the privilege of being there in Ramada (bloody hot + no fun = v annoying) and I got to stay in the work villa which included the office so arguably i didn’t really get to know the city.
This trip has worked out a little different.
Let’s start with the weather- holy flamoly batman what difference it is in January. The days are beautifully warm, that awesome temperature around 23 degrees. And this time i actually got to stay in a hotel (more about that later so off I trot after work down to the Corniche. One of the things i have learnt through my extensive middle eastern travel (yes now that is Jordan, Lebanon, Turkey & UAE- pretty sure that counts as extensive) is that the Corniche rocks. It reminds me of home down there on the water. So down on the Corniche in Abu Dhabi a promenaded (as that is what you do on a cornice). Now its no Lebanon cornice (severely lacking in bread handbags) but it was here that i discovered that everyone is Abu Dhabi and not big lard arses that don’t walk anywhere i was just looking in the wrong place (or i found all the foreigners and my initial opion was right).
Deciding to explore a little more i adventured off the cornice and through the city. Now let me warn you here people- the map that i was given from the hotel had only every say 10 streets which made it a little difficult. Add that in with feeling like i had taken a wrong turn into India i finally found some roads which met up on my map. This caused a little, momentary freak- according to my map i was way off location possible hours off location. So what did i do? I decided to treat that map like satnav and ignore it and continue going the way i wanted- guess who won that arguement.
Feeling liberated by staying in a hotel & my after work cornice expedition i decide to plan out some more after work excursions. Excitedly i looked online and learnt there were many exciting things to see and do in abu dhabi- the cornice, the grand mosque and malls, malls & more malls. Whoop whoop.
The blue mosque was pretty cool, though that being said i don’t know if i would have picked that pattern for the world’s largest carpet.
High: laughing at the dummies dressed in all their saris with sunnies on looking cool- then realising i was rocking trousers, long sleeve top with dress over the top and scarf jauntily wrapped around my head.... and sunglasses.
Low: realising i had been staring way to long trying to work out how the woman with bull burkha one was going to eat her burger without flashing a little face.
Travel tip: do not trust maps, they will only confuse you in the middle east.
Travel tip 2: apparently all the good stuff is outside of the city for abu dhabi- camels, sand ... camels
Travel tip 3: Just because you see 10,000 Hardees sign and really want a Fishtastic doesn't mean you'll be able to find one.
Travel tip 4: i don’t think i’m wrong about the spoilt rich kid thing- a desert country should not be showing off with that many water fountains, it’s just rude (yes i realise that was not a tip).
Saturday, 19 June 2010
rollin through jordan
whoooo- on the road again. you've just gotta love a road trip. of course we decied to drive to Petra with out a real road map, and with our amazing map we manage to hit the KIngs Highway without even realising it- the most beautiful road to Petra. Now, the trip was suppose to take about 2 hours but with our accidental bypass it was more like 5, oh well.
essentiall we drove for fkn hours but the most amazing thing was this amazing canyon which try to rival the Grand Canyon. and to be fair its pretty amazing- especially when you're driving through it
highlights of the drive:
* playing speed bump spotto- those things are not marked and when you're travelling at 100kms it can hurt
* having to camando pee in someone' garden cause you're busting so much and there are no services
* checkin out the locals who aren't expecting tourists
in the end we arrived in Petra late with no hotel booked and no idea how long we were staying . we managed to get into the hotel the lonely planet recommened and whilke they were still serving dinner- score!
ps when 2 girls have been alone together just them for days, its really easy to forget to remember social niceties when you see others again.
Travel Tip 2: DO NOT KEEP YOUR WINDOW OPEN NO MATTER HOW HOT IT IS- the call to prayer and sparrow's fart WILL scare the CRAP out of you!
essentiall we drove for fkn hours but the most amazing thing was this amazing canyon which try to rival the Grand Canyon. and to be fair its pretty amazing- especially when you're driving through it
highlights of the drive:
* playing speed bump spotto- those things are not marked and when you're travelling at 100kms it can hurt
* having to camando pee in someone' garden cause you're busting so much and there are no services
* checkin out the locals who aren't expecting tourists
in the end we arrived in Petra late with no hotel booked and no idea how long we were staying . we managed to get into the hotel the lonely planet recommened and whilke they were still serving dinner- score!
ps when 2 girls have been alone together just them for days, its really easy to forget to remember social niceties when you see others again.
Travel Tip 2: DO NOT KEEP YOUR WINDOW OPEN NO MATTER HOW HOT IT IS- the call to prayer and sparrow's fart WILL scare the CRAP out of you!
Amman-a get out of this place!
if its the last thing I ever do!-- ok seriously lame joke but, honestly, inner for crappest city ever....Amman! Now there's an award you want to win.
In all honesty Mails & I rocked up tired after our whopping 40 minute flight from Beirut then poor Mails had to pretend to be Katherine and make small talk about Iraq to our driver all the way until the apartment. Ps cheers for the free apartment. Thankfully we had been given the heads up from the seaoned Amman travellers that it was, in 2 words, a crap hole- oops that was 3.
so anyway we dropped our crap and headed into the city. Now realistically its kind of cool having the city over 7 hills and when we headed to the anient ruins where the Temple of Hercules is it was kind of cool. But we were bloody hot and walking down the hill to the souk the only thing that saved us an awesome dodgey kebab shop. Now you've may hae worked out that mails' tummy isn't the best so she was a little hesitant, but that doesn't stop me and Mails isn''t one to miss out. Which leads us to lesson 1- Jordan has rockin kebabs.
all nie and kebabed up we hit the souk wher all i can say is (no not with shame) the scarf tally went to 16. otherwise to behonest the souk was crap comapred to what we had seen before- though we did find a little tat, and you know how we love the tat!
so hot & fucked off we went back to the apartment - you have no idea how frustraing it is getting a taxi outside the souk when you are used to the 10,000 beep beep's of the lebanese taxi's wherever you go. anyways we had a littl egrump on and decided it was time to mke out move to Petra.
Travel Tip 1: when trying to get a hire car, the most expensive hotel in town is not going to have the mos reasonable car hire place
In all honesty Mails & I rocked up tired after our whopping 40 minute flight from Beirut then poor Mails had to pretend to be Katherine and make small talk about Iraq to our driver all the way until the apartment. Ps cheers for the free apartment. Thankfully we had been given the heads up from the seaoned Amman travellers that it was, in 2 words, a crap hole- oops that was 3.
so anyway we dropped our crap and headed into the city. Now realistically its kind of cool having the city over 7 hills and when we headed to the anient ruins where the Temple of Hercules is it was kind of cool. But we were bloody hot and walking down the hill to the souk the only thing that saved us an awesome dodgey kebab shop. Now you've may hae worked out that mails' tummy isn't the best so she was a little hesitant, but that doesn't stop me and Mails isn''t one to miss out. Which leads us to lesson 1- Jordan has rockin kebabs.
all nie and kebabed up we hit the souk wher all i can say is (no not with shame) the scarf tally went to 16. otherwise to behonest the souk was crap comapred to what we had seen before- though we did find a little tat, and you know how we love the tat!
so hot & fucked off we went back to the apartment - you have no idea how frustraing it is getting a taxi outside the souk when you are used to the 10,000 beep beep's of the lebanese taxi's wherever you go. anyways we had a littl egrump on and decided it was time to mke out move to Petra.
Travel Tip 1: when trying to get a hire car, the most expensive hotel in town is not going to have the mos reasonable car hire place
Thursday, 17 June 2010
All scarfed up and nowhere to go
Actually that’s not true- we essentially went from one end of the country to the other with our little hire car.
After looking at these massive caves with Stalagmites and stalactites we motored up to Byblos which was suppose to have some awesome ruins- spoiler alert- they haven’t, the ruins are crap. Bearing in mind Mails & I had no plans or accommodation booked we decided to drive the girls up to the snow and stay the night up there. Yes you heard me right, snow! Is there anything Lebanon can’t do!!! We had a quiet but boozey night in at the hotel which was good and then went out to the slopes the next morning. To put it into perspective for you – we saw one guy skiing in his swimming trunks.
The plan was to head up to Tripoli next to check that out but we got as far as driving into the heart of the city, losing our temper and driving out. Oh well, it looked like a crap hole anyway. The only good thing out of that little journey is we finally found the transformer chicken place and got our Fishtastic, and let me tell you they were totally Fishtastic.
All renewed we headed up to the Bearre valley up near the other ski resort and found a cheap little hotel looking over the entire valley. Let me tell you this was gorgeous. To make it even better Mails & i did our favourite thing – grabbed some wine and snacks and sat on the balcony chatting till the sun went down (so romantic) and then continued with the wine while we watched the Oscars.
The final full day for Lebanon was spent booting it down south to Siddon. We had a super yummy and cheap lunch after which i decided it was best for me to scarf up as there was a lot of staring going on at my heathen red hair- damn mails and her dark hair and olivey complexion. We went for a wander through the souk- i thought it was awesome. It’s from ancient times and they still have people working and living in there but Mails wasn’t such a fan. It was here that the un-natural collection of scarves really started.
All stocked up on scarves I convinced Mails that we should head for Tyre. Now according to the guide book Siddon is as far south as you should go to be safe unless you check the travel warnings. If they are good go down to Tyre, do not go off the main roads and avoid the UN at all costs (nobody like the UN). So, all convinced we headed off to Tyre. Ok, I’ll admit, I forgot to read out the bit about the travel warnings when I was doing the convincing and I wouldn’t even have a clue where you check them anyway. After driving about 10 mins down the motorway we got diverted. We pulled off the motor way, both thinking about the book’s warning not to go off the main track, but determine not to be the first to scream and run away. I’ll admit when we had to drive past the big camp I did start to think maybe it wasn’t a good idea. But when has that ever stooped us. We continued down to Tyre panicing every time we saw the UN tanks around.
Turns out we didn’t see much of Tyre at all- I think we’d gotten ourselves a bit worked up and didn’t want to leave the car and there seemd to be lots of construction going on so it didn’t seem very pretty. The funniest thing of all though was when I got us stuck in a tinny narrow lane driving around the town. What was even funnier was that some guy on a scooter was interested enough in my awesome driving moods he drove past 4 times. To this day I am convinced if Lebanese Mamma hadn’t come out and directed us we would still be there today.
Oh yeah, and did I mention we did all of this without a real map- definitely O for awesome.
After looking at these massive caves with Stalagmites and stalactites we motored up to Byblos which was suppose to have some awesome ruins- spoiler alert- they haven’t, the ruins are crap. Bearing in mind Mails & I had no plans or accommodation booked we decided to drive the girls up to the snow and stay the night up there. Yes you heard me right, snow! Is there anything Lebanon can’t do!!! We had a quiet but boozey night in at the hotel which was good and then went out to the slopes the next morning. To put it into perspective for you – we saw one guy skiing in his swimming trunks.
The plan was to head up to Tripoli next to check that out but we got as far as driving into the heart of the city, losing our temper and driving out. Oh well, it looked like a crap hole anyway. The only good thing out of that little journey is we finally found the transformer chicken place and got our Fishtastic, and let me tell you they were totally Fishtastic.
All renewed we headed up to the Bearre valley up near the other ski resort and found a cheap little hotel looking over the entire valley. Let me tell you this was gorgeous. To make it even better Mails & i did our favourite thing – grabbed some wine and snacks and sat on the balcony chatting till the sun went down (so romantic) and then continued with the wine while we watched the Oscars.
The final full day for Lebanon was spent booting it down south to Siddon. We had a super yummy and cheap lunch after which i decided it was best for me to scarf up as there was a lot of staring going on at my heathen red hair- damn mails and her dark hair and olivey complexion. We went for a wander through the souk- i thought it was awesome. It’s from ancient times and they still have people working and living in there but Mails wasn’t such a fan. It was here that the un-natural collection of scarves really started.
All stocked up on scarves I convinced Mails that we should head for Tyre. Now according to the guide book Siddon is as far south as you should go to be safe unless you check the travel warnings. If they are good go down to Tyre, do not go off the main roads and avoid the UN at all costs (nobody like the UN). So, all convinced we headed off to Tyre. Ok, I’ll admit, I forgot to read out the bit about the travel warnings when I was doing the convincing and I wouldn’t even have a clue where you check them anyway. After driving about 10 mins down the motorway we got diverted. We pulled off the motor way, both thinking about the book’s warning not to go off the main track, but determine not to be the first to scream and run away. I’ll admit when we had to drive past the big camp I did start to think maybe it wasn’t a good idea. But when has that ever stooped us. We continued down to Tyre panicing every time we saw the UN tanks around.
Turns out we didn’t see much of Tyre at all- I think we’d gotten ourselves a bit worked up and didn’t want to leave the car and there seemd to be lots of construction going on so it didn’t seem very pretty. The funniest thing of all though was when I got us stuck in a tinny narrow lane driving around the town. What was even funnier was that some guy on a scooter was interested enough in my awesome driving moods he drove past 4 times. To this day I am convinced if Lebanese Mamma hadn’t come out and directed us we would still be there today.
Oh yeah, and did I mention we did all of this without a real map- definitely O for awesome.
Lessons from Lebanon
There are a few important things I learnt while in Lebanon and if we hadn’t hired a car I might never have become this wise:
1. There is no need to let lanes dictate to you. If you can realistically fit 4 cars on the road you should have 4, not the 2 that the lanes think- what do lanes know?
2. Using your indicator is a sign of weakness. If driving is about survival of the fittest then you can’t afford any weakness
3. Beeping your horn is essential in all situations- changing lanes, turning corners, driving straight etc. The smart move is to drive with your hand on your horn permanently (yes I am aware that sounds dirty)
4. If you park straight then there is more of a chance of someone touching your car. Embrace your inner French and where possible take up 2 parking bays
5. Lebanese time is different to London time or Perth time. Essentially if someone says 5 minutes times it by 10 add 51 divide by 0.3 and then multiply by that number again you will have how long it is really going to take.
6. Redheads cannot be terrorists. You can drive through 10,000 checkpoint charlies –scarf or no scarf- and as soon as they see your lily white face and heathen red hair you are going to get waved through. No matter how much you want to be checked. It’s like they have never heard of the IRA
7. Burnouts in the snow are fun. Nothing more really to be said here.
1. There is no need to let lanes dictate to you. If you can realistically fit 4 cars on the road you should have 4, not the 2 that the lanes think- what do lanes know?
2. Using your indicator is a sign of weakness. If driving is about survival of the fittest then you can’t afford any weakness
3. Beeping your horn is essential in all situations- changing lanes, turning corners, driving straight etc. The smart move is to drive with your hand on your horn permanently (yes I am aware that sounds dirty)
4. If you park straight then there is more of a chance of someone touching your car. Embrace your inner French and where possible take up 2 parking bays
5. Lebanese time is different to London time or Perth time. Essentially if someone says 5 minutes times it by 10 add 51 divide by 0.3 and then multiply by that number again you will have how long it is really going to take.
6. Redheads cannot be terrorists. You can drive through 10,000 checkpoint charlies –scarf or no scarf- and as soon as they see your lily white face and heathen red hair you are going to get waved through. No matter how much you want to be checked. It’s like they have never heard of the IRA
7. Burnouts in the snow are fun. Nothing more really to be said here.
Aussie girls scarfing it up in Lebanon
You know its going to end in trouble when Aussie girls head out to the middle east without even a clue in their pocket, but that's what we did anyway.
We started with an awesome trip in to the Bekaa Valley- yes folks Hezbollah territory- but stopped on the way at the Ksara vineyard. After telling our driver it would be an hour we rolled out giggling 3 hours later. How were we supposed to know that there was a video, a tour, mega wine tasting (not like the piddly amount you normally get) and then it would have been rude if we didn't take some time to drink a few bottles in their nice house thing. In Oz its just a case of rocking up to the tasting with your 'i know what i'm doing and i intend to buy' face on, grab as much tasters as you can get and then sneak out at the first chance their attention leaves you.
so it was back into the car and on to Baalbek which is right in hezbollah head quarters but has some gorgeous ancient ruins/temples. we got to have a wander around, literally on them, posing for piccies and just plain being stupid. on the way out we grabbed a few beers and jumped into the car. now it turns out that the town is supposed to be completely dry (i guess that's the hezbo influence) so our driver had a panic attack about the beers. i guess it makes sense why we got the beer out of a locked fridge. oh well, we just scootched down in the car and drank our beer camando style (no not without pants).
it tuns out that Bekaa valley is most famous for dope which is weird considering the freak out about the beer but to be honest- didn't really see any evidence of it at all.
We started with an awesome trip in to the Bekaa Valley- yes folks Hezbollah territory- but stopped on the way at the Ksara vineyard. After telling our driver it would be an hour we rolled out giggling 3 hours later. How were we supposed to know that there was a video, a tour, mega wine tasting (not like the piddly amount you normally get) and then it would have been rude if we didn't take some time to drink a few bottles in their nice house thing. In Oz its just a case of rocking up to the tasting with your 'i know what i'm doing and i intend to buy' face on, grab as much tasters as you can get and then sneak out at the first chance their attention leaves you.
so it was back into the car and on to Baalbek which is right in hezbollah head quarters but has some gorgeous ancient ruins/temples. we got to have a wander around, literally on them, posing for piccies and just plain being stupid. on the way out we grabbed a few beers and jumped into the car. now it turns out that the town is supposed to be completely dry (i guess that's the hezbo influence) so our driver had a panic attack about the beers. i guess it makes sense why we got the beer out of a locked fridge. oh well, we just scootched down in the car and drank our beer camando style (no not without pants).
it tuns out that Bekaa valley is most famous for dope which is weird considering the freak out about the beer but to be honest- didn't really see any evidence of it at all.
Let's get Lebanon Lebanon, I wanna get Lebanoooon
"Derelict"- Mugatu, Zoolander
Beirut is the definitly the Derelict range of all the cities I have been to- but the most interesting. I would porobably even vote it up there as one of the favourites. Its absolutely one of those place where you have look beyond- at first glance its just war torn and fallign apart, but when you look carefully you see how stunning it was and still is.
One of the things I have noticed when travelling around is that the cultures that annoy you or you find funny at home aren't the same when you get to their country. Its like the further away from the mothership they are the worse they are. Not the Lebanese, they still keep that real wog boy element about them.
Bearing in mind Lebanon's history, the first thing you are going ot notice is the military presence. Not being used to that or expecting it (yes we are that ignorant) it was a bit of a novelty, expecially when we discovered you're not suppoed to take pictures of any of the soliders or check point. Naturally that was the start of a great new game for us.... military camera spotto. There is nothing funnier than trying to watch western girls miming that they are taking pics of the building next to the military and that their cameras have wide angled lenses (try it, it too is a fun game, especially after booze).
Beirut is the definitly the Derelict range of all the cities I have been to- but the most interesting. I would porobably even vote it up there as one of the favourites. Its absolutely one of those place where you have look beyond- at first glance its just war torn and fallign apart, but when you look carefully you see how stunning it was and still is.
One of the things I have noticed when travelling around is that the cultures that annoy you or you find funny at home aren't the same when you get to their country. Its like the further away from the mothership they are the worse they are. Not the Lebanese, they still keep that real wog boy element about them.
Bearing in mind Lebanon's history, the first thing you are going ot notice is the military presence. Not being used to that or expecting it (yes we are that ignorant) it was a bit of a novelty, expecially when we discovered you're not suppoed to take pictures of any of the soliders or check point. Naturally that was the start of a great new game for us.... military camera spotto. There is nothing funnier than trying to watch western girls miming that they are taking pics of the building next to the military and that their cameras have wide angled lenses (try it, it too is a fun game, especially after booze).
IoW IoW IoW IoW
I lots my festival V at the Isle of Wight - no, I can't believe it took that long but really we all know I'm not a fan of crowds. We all snuck off early from work and did the trip down to the ferry. Like all road trips it started with me in a panic attack about being late & Al all flustered cause he didn' have his crap ready and finished with booze.
We made it to the campsite and after setting up 3 tents in the wind I had a stop and left the others. Needless to say it was a crappy night but it was made even crapper by waking up to a completely flooded tent and all the clothes soaked. Naturally in the morning it was temper tantrums from me with a great big "I'm checking into a spa!"
After going into Cowe and getting a new tent, dry underwear and a dry top the sun came out and the whole weekend changed.
Booze, booze & booze, I think that is an apat description of the Friday... not so much on the Saturday but more so on the Sunday-- yes it seems we are getting a little old to do 3 heavy days in a row.
Highlights of the weeekend:
* Al trying to convince us that he was so drunk because of the drinking games he was playing with the 21month old child in the tent next door
* The mega sing along to Crowdede House- except for the pimply backed cock who seemed to be hearing a completely different set in his head if his dancing was anything to go by.
* Trying to convince 'naughty Vicky' to come out to play
* The Twister ride after too many gin & sprites with Ems where we just cacked ourselves laughing the whole time
* Mails blaming the wind for her fallign over drunk onto the tent and breaking it- made even funnier by me trying to break it on purpose the next day to chuck it in the bin, and not being able to
* Turning into a teenie bopper and screaming PINK PIIIIIIIINK PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINK- OH MY GOD SHE IS AMAZING to anyone who even came within 2metres.
To be hinest i'm pretty sure i could sit here all after noon doing the highlights real but the absolute best thing ever.........
USing a real toilet with real toilet paper and real water and soap when we left
We made it to the campsite and after setting up 3 tents in the wind I had a stop and left the others. Needless to say it was a crappy night but it was made even crapper by waking up to a completely flooded tent and all the clothes soaked. Naturally in the morning it was temper tantrums from me with a great big "I'm checking into a spa!"
After going into Cowe and getting a new tent, dry underwear and a dry top the sun came out and the whole weekend changed.
Booze, booze & booze, I think that is an apat description of the Friday... not so much on the Saturday but more so on the Sunday-- yes it seems we are getting a little old to do 3 heavy days in a row.
Highlights of the weeekend:
* Al trying to convince us that he was so drunk because of the drinking games he was playing with the 21month old child in the tent next door
* The mega sing along to Crowdede House- except for the pimply backed cock who seemed to be hearing a completely different set in his head if his dancing was anything to go by.
* Trying to convince 'naughty Vicky' to come out to play
* The Twister ride after too many gin & sprites with Ems where we just cacked ourselves laughing the whole time
* Mails blaming the wind for her fallign over drunk onto the tent and breaking it- made even funnier by me trying to break it on purpose the next day to chuck it in the bin, and not being able to
* Turning into a teenie bopper and screaming PINK PIIIIIIIINK PIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINK- OH MY GOD SHE IS AMAZING to anyone who even came within 2metres.
To be hinest i'm pretty sure i could sit here all after noon doing the highlights real but the absolute best thing ever.........
USing a real toilet with real toilet paper and real water and soap when we left
Thursday, 17 December 2009
quokka soccer
nothing beats a race for a 8 am ferry to rotto! I love aussie ferries though- unlike the old british ones, they actually wait for people! so we made it onto our litle bikes and it was after quick rotto bakery stop that i remembered... i hate riding bikes. Oh well, had to put it up with it for the next 5 hours. we disocvered some awesome swiming spots that had bugger all peope around them (benefits fo heaidng over before the official school holibags). the beches are amazing with crystal blue water, but the island itself is hot hot hot with bush scrub stuff-- but as its an island it means when you get hot riding around you just jump into the water.
after the stonking big ride we chowed down on red rooster (god bless the return of cheesey nuggets) and then headed over to the quokka arms- which it turns out has had a massive refurb and looks all fancy pants. All in all the island hasn't changed much which is nice and it is still a gorgeous place to go. Wish we had done what we saw at one of the beaches though: boat pulls up and a group of about 20 guys swim up to the beach with eskys, cricket bats etc and a quick game on the beach. Not that I am the biggest cricket fane, but how bloody good is a boat ride and swim into the island!
Animal checklist so far:
Quokkas- and lost of them. i completely forgot just how tame these little things are. I watched a 3 year old girl bear hugging one and when it tried to make a break away she pulled it back- it just went back to the cuddle, no bite, nothing.
Big King Lizard- biggest lizard on rotto probably about a foot or a bit more big. And yes, it scared the crap out of me when it ran past, i've been away from home too long and seem to be jumping with the site of every animal
Pelicans- what can you say about these, they are what they are
Stacks of fish- no idea what sorts but we sore heaps of ones from whiting size to about 2 fooot big ones when we went snorkling. One of those things when i am so amazed by what i see but at the same time scare the crap out of myself thinking the bog ones will try and eat me.
after the stonking big ride we chowed down on red rooster (god bless the return of cheesey nuggets) and then headed over to the quokka arms- which it turns out has had a massive refurb and looks all fancy pants. All in all the island hasn't changed much which is nice and it is still a gorgeous place to go. Wish we had done what we saw at one of the beaches though: boat pulls up and a group of about 20 guys swim up to the beach with eskys, cricket bats etc and a quick game on the beach. Not that I am the biggest cricket fane, but how bloody good is a boat ride and swim into the island!
Animal checklist so far:
Quokkas- and lost of them. i completely forgot just how tame these little things are. I watched a 3 year old girl bear hugging one and when it tried to make a break away she pulled it back- it just went back to the cuddle, no bite, nothing.
Big King Lizard- biggest lizard on rotto probably about a foot or a bit more big. And yes, it scared the crap out of me when it ran past, i've been away from home too long and seem to be jumping with the site of every animal
Pelicans- what can you say about these, they are what they are
Stacks of fish- no idea what sorts but we sore heaps of ones from whiting size to about 2 fooot big ones when we went snorkling. One of those things when i am so amazed by what i see but at the same time scare the crap out of myself thinking the bog ones will try and eat me.
Sunday, 13 December 2009
kangeroos- tick, dolphins- tick tick
nothing beats 4wd driving out to a beach where you are the only people around! we went out with the fam up to Lancelin to test out mum & dad's new 4wd. honestly, don't know why more people don't do it- the journey is super fun and then when you get to that crystal clear beach and you're teh only ones around, well it just can't be beat really. actually, come to think of it, its a good thing not everyone does it or you'd have a long drive to find the isolated beach.
the only downfall is that i lost my bloody memory card. i ran out of battery power so was taking my card out to put into mum's camera when we went over some real boucy bits-- the card pinged out of the camera, bunced off my boob and must have gone out of the window. so annoying, stupid kanergoos trying to get me to take their picture, its all their fault! That'll tach me for acting like a bloody tourist!
dinner was some lanceling dhufish at the bogan pub on the beach- god i love bogan pubs, grreat music and chilled atmosphere (though apparently not at new years when everyone gets into fights- god bless that new year spirit)
tomorrow is off to rotto.....
the only downfall is that i lost my bloody memory card. i ran out of battery power so was taking my card out to put into mum's camera when we went over some real boucy bits-- the card pinged out of the camera, bunced off my boob and must have gone out of the window. so annoying, stupid kanergoos trying to get me to take their picture, its all their fault! That'll tach me for acting like a bloody tourist!
dinner was some lanceling dhufish at the bogan pub on the beach- god i love bogan pubs, grreat music and chilled atmosphere (though apparently not at new years when everyone gets into fights- god bless that new year spirit)
tomorrow is off to rotto.....
aussie, aussie, aussie
We made it!! it seemed like it took forever but we finally made it. Going through passport control was super quick, i considered suggesting they send some Aussies over to Heathrow on a job exchange to show them how its done-- then we got to customs. Man-o-man, i know we have no mad cow, rabbies or other diseased bug type thingys but god was it slow. PLus the family were all huddled arouung the doors waving everytime someone waled through which was nice but got a bit of a ssore arm with 1/2 hour of waving!
The fam took me down to Hillarys boat harbour, i had completely forgotten just how beatuiful our beaches are. we sat at the Breaky (which is a new fancy pants nice version of an old skany pub) having some ice cold beers and groumet pizza- i tell you this is living.
after that we headed over to my bros for more beers and a little look at the christmas light displays- another thing i had forgotten about. right after all this i met up with al over at a friend's place where more beers were consumed. is it a suprise that this morning started with a litttle bit of a hangover.
The fam took me down to Hillarys boat harbour, i had completely forgotten just how beatuiful our beaches are. we sat at the Breaky (which is a new fancy pants nice version of an old skany pub) having some ice cold beers and groumet pizza- i tell you this is living.
after that we headed over to my bros for more beers and a little look at the christmas light displays- another thing i had forgotten about. right after all this i met up with al over at a friend's place where more beers were consumed. is it a suprise that this morning started with a litttle bit of a hangover.
Friday, 11 December 2009
western dummies
It was a pretty exhausting but good day today. We went out to SIm LIm Square which is an electorinics mall- 7 stories of electronics! I'm not sure what i was expecting but seriously- after the 2nd floor it gets pretty boring- i mean how many iphones, cables & cameras does one person need?
So we headed back out into the heat for a stroll through little india. to be honest it wasn't really how the book described it- maybe i missed something but really, not worth the heat.
then it was a quick trip down to sentosa island including a monorail- yeas that right, a monorail (yesi still get stupidly excitd about them after that simpsons episode). Sentosa really played to the theme of singers being weird. there's heaps of amusement park type thingys, people take photos in front of construction sites(!) and the beaches which are supposed to be beautiful have really soft lovely sand but look out onto industrial ships. Really you can't relax on a beach looking at industry. I just found the whole thing odd really.
Once we got to the mainland and walked through our 10,000th mall i noticed, what is going down as the oddest thing here-- all the dummies in the shops are western sized, and the clothes aren't! what the hell???? i think they put their xtra large sizes on them or something
the coolest thing abouttoday has beene the night safari- all the cool animals that are normally asleep at the zoo are up and about playing. i hhighly recommend it- plus i learnt some intersting fact (while lauging at the over the top american accent/siong song story time voice of the guide)
soo now i'm off to have 2 girraffe sleeps (yes, i learnt girraffes sleep between 10 mins & 2hours sleep a day) before jumping on the plane home-- word on the grape vine is it is 38 degrees... god help me and my freckles
So we headed back out into the heat for a stroll through little india. to be honest it wasn't really how the book described it- maybe i missed something but really, not worth the heat.
then it was a quick trip down to sentosa island including a monorail- yeas that right, a monorail (yesi still get stupidly excitd about them after that simpsons episode). Sentosa really played to the theme of singers being weird. there's heaps of amusement park type thingys, people take photos in front of construction sites(!) and the beaches which are supposed to be beautiful have really soft lovely sand but look out onto industrial ships. Really you can't relax on a beach looking at industry. I just found the whole thing odd really.
Once we got to the mainland and walked through our 10,000th mall i noticed, what is going down as the oddest thing here-- all the dummies in the shops are western sized, and the clothes aren't! what the hell???? i think they put their xtra large sizes on them or something
the coolest thing abouttoday has beene the night safari- all the cool animals that are normally asleep at the zoo are up and about playing. i hhighly recommend it- plus i learnt some intersting fact (while lauging at the over the top american accent/siong song story time voice of the guide)
soo now i'm off to have 2 girraffe sleeps (yes, i learnt girraffes sleep between 10 mins & 2hours sleep a day) before jumping on the plane home-- word on the grape vine is it is 38 degrees... god help me and my freckles
Thursday, 10 December 2009
3-way in the pool
Yesterday I discovered that I didn't pack as well as i though for singapore- for example, i forgot underwear. So while out and about i had to grab somethings, swimming goggles being one of them. Of course i had to get special ones to fit my, and i'm quoting the sales assistant here, 'big, wide eyes'. That was a bit of a mile stone for me- i've never been told i have fat eyes before!
So i took them for a test run today- it was all very civilised, me and 1 other guy doing laps. What you need to understtand is that my swimming 'style' is not the most graceul. Its not for me the graceful cutting-through-the-water-like-a-fish, I'm more of a clumsy australian crawl/drowning style- i essentially look like I've been told there's only enough gin left for 1 g & tx and i have to crawl through mud to get to it.
Then a 3rd guy came along and it got a little complicated. suddenly i was trying to avoid this guy who seemed insistent on doing what can only be know as the 'hip and shoulder' of teh swimming world. Now i always try to be polite in other countires and be a little respectful (yes, totally not my normal style) and then it dawned on me.... he was staying in the hotel too, that meant he was a visitor too- fuck polite. So it was on and a nice leaisurely 40 min swim turned into bumper cars.
ps- i was the last one left in the pool.
So i took them for a test run today- it was all very civilised, me and 1 other guy doing laps. What you need to understtand is that my swimming 'style' is not the most graceul. Its not for me the graceful cutting-through-the-water-like-a-fish, I'm more of a clumsy australian crawl/drowning style- i essentially look like I've been told there's only enough gin left for 1 g & tx and i have to crawl through mud to get to it.
Then a 3rd guy came along and it got a little complicated. suddenly i was trying to avoid this guy who seemed insistent on doing what can only be know as the 'hip and shoulder' of teh swimming world. Now i always try to be polite in other countires and be a little respectful (yes, totally not my normal style) and then it dawned on me.... he was staying in the hotel too, that meant he was a visitor too- fuck polite. So it was on and a nice leaisurely 40 min swim turned into bumper cars.
ps- i was the last one left in the pool.
Singapore Sling
Right- 12 hours of flying over and done with! Sadly, i jinxed us before we even got on the plane- i was so excited about leaving 'computer says no' land and may have gotten a little cocky about it and then had the crappest service ever on qantas. i mean, i know we're in a recession and all, but 20 mins for a trollelly dolly to get a gin & tonic and a beer!
anyway, all in all it wasn't bad. after the first drink i realised it had been ages since i had been ratted on a plane so made that my mission and to get the The Boy and stranger sharing our row ratted too. Ps- mission successful!
so now we arein singers- its a weird place to be honest- its asia but not asia, that's the only way i can think to decribe it. and so many shopping malls, i honestly didn't know what to do with myself! shame we were so tired i felt like vomitting. had to go in for a couple of hours power nap and then was good as new.
this evening we've just been wandering around looking at crap and popped into a little bar for some singapore slings-- shamefully the bar was called A London Pub.
well its night night from me- having room services and crashign out ready to start a big day tomorrow
anyway, all in all it wasn't bad. after the first drink i realised it had been ages since i had been ratted on a plane so made that my mission and to get the The Boy and stranger sharing our row ratted too. Ps- mission successful!
so now we arein singers- its a weird place to be honest- its asia but not asia, that's the only way i can think to decribe it. and so many shopping malls, i honestly didn't know what to do with myself! shame we were so tired i felt like vomitting. had to go in for a couple of hours power nap and then was good as new.
this evening we've just been wandering around looking at crap and popped into a little bar for some singapore slings-- shamefully the bar was called A London Pub.
well its night night from me- having room services and crashign out ready to start a big day tomorrow
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